I will rain on your parade.

I make a promise, from now on, to call things as I see them. I now strip off all fear of being branded a bigot, a racist (everyone is, anyway), sexist, or just plain ignorant. Better that than being some bandwagon-jumping, all-understanding, comfort-offering, bleeding heart liar.

Expect no quarter here.

Ask me how you look today. If I see you look like the discount whore you can only hope to be, you will know about it.

Hug that tree all you want. Should a need for firewood arise, I will cut it down.

Stand behind that cause you profess to love so dearly. When it presents an obstacle to a need more immediate than religious freedom, I will run right through it. And knowing your belief is more fad than conviction, I should not have too much trouble.

I do this for no one else but me.